I am not at my best when my wife is away.  She just got back from Washington, D.C. — I’ve written about it on my Dandelife blog.  Here, however, I like to focus on the music, and there were a lot of changes during the last two months.

Looking back, I can see there were six distinct time periods:

1. Before her departure, I’d just completed FAWM, and decided to begin my Woodshed project (a period of intense practice).
2. By the time she’d left for D.C., I had shifted to bebop, and spent a lot of time sharpening my “classic jazz” skills.  This period focused on the keyboard, and I developed a lot of new sounds and phrases on the organ.
3. Less than a week after she left, I began to dedicate more and more time in the evenings to playing music.  This meant withdrawing, somewhat, from the internet.  I reduced my posting level from daily to once every three days on this blog and on Dandelife.  As the folks on DMusic and Jamendo might tell you, I became more and more scarce as the weeks wore on.
4. At the midway point, Hannah came back to Gainesville for a visit; the next weekend, I went to D.C. for a visit.  There was so much activity during this time that my practice times became erratic; this usually causes a shift in styles for me.
5. Sure enough, when I returned to Gainesville, I began focusing on guitar and creating phrases by ear.  My goal was to invent something I’d never heard before each night.  Also, I spent a lot of time playing along with favorite albums of mine — learning what made the songs “work.”  My companion during this period was the TV series Babylon 5, which I have on DVD — I would sit in the living room and practice, sometimes pretending to be the “theme music” for the episode — changing what I was playing to accommodate the action on the screen.
6. Finally, here at the end, the parts of the great machine started wearing out.  I became depressed.  Every hill of a problem seemed to be a mountain.  In the end, practicing for three or four hours a night was not uncommon, punctuated only by walking with the dogs.

I call this entire process “The Persephone Effect.”  When Persephone went away, each year the earth died, and winter ruled.  It is the same with me.  When Hannah is away, the green fades to brown, the ground freezes, and the nights become unbearably long.

OK, I had a revelation this morning.  It’s around 7 am on a Sunday morning, and here I am, having been up since 4:30.  Until my wife returns safely from Washington D.C. (April 28th), nothing in this old universe is going to seem right to me.

I realize now that, for the past few weeks, everything has been painted in progressively darker and darker shades.  Thinking back on my last two blog entries, I see that any other time, these events wouldn’t bother me so much.  However, right now, the world is in disbalance.  Hannah is my anchor, my reference point; without her around, I have started to drift off course.

However, I can say one thing.  Musically, this has been a very productive time.  I estimate I have been practicing around 3 to 4 hours a night.  I am living in the woodshed.  I am learning new things, and starting to hear music in different ways.  By the time I’m ready to start recording my third Jamendo album, I will have changed my style and my sound.

In the mean time, until she comes back to me, this is what I’m going to do: shut up.  See you all after the 28th.

It’s been a while since I looked at my download numbers on Jamendo.  When I looked today, this is what I found:

In total, both albums have been downloaded more than 700 times.  The web interface at Jamendo is always being improved — sometimes at a dizzying pace, such that if you come back after a week you are astounded.  One of the most recent additions is a count of the number of listens — 2409 for evolution, 3624 for handmade.

Those numbers amaze me.  As I mentioned in another article, I used to keep my music to myself.

Well, as the title of this entry says, I’m at another crossroads of sorts.

I am working on my third Jamendo album.  Right now I’m not recording, but am instead practicing and developing new techniques.  The question is, by the time I am ready to release “III”, will the online world have changed so much that I will no longer fit in?

Jamendo is getting more and more popular.  But as I said last week, the side effect of any growth is an increase in all segments of the population — even the rude and mean ones.

I have been on the internet a long time.  It seems when anything starts up, there is a sort of a grace period while the community builds, a time when the world is new and everyone seems to be treating each other with greater care.

Then, a few years in, cliques develop; mean people come in looking for trouble; trolls start fires just for fun; politeness goes away.   By no means is this pervasive on Jamendo as of yet, but as I said last week, there is at least one rude, arrogant person whose entire objective seems to be to review every album on the site and leave snide comments like some wannabe Simon Cowell.

Maybe I might understand this if this were some pay site.  However, considering that most of the artists on Jamendo are doing what they do for the sheer love of music, it seems mighty out of place to have this holier-than-thou hypocrite come down on everyone who doesn’t fit his “enlightened” sensibilities.  Maybe this person wants to be the Big Velvet Rope that keeps the riffraff out.  Is that the sort of thing that belongs on a “free” music site?

“So much has been lost, so much forgotten. So much pain, so much blood. And for what? I wonder. The past tempts us, the present confuses us, and the future frightens us. And our lives slip away, moment by moment, lost in that vast terrible in-between. But there is still time to seize that one last, fragile moment. To choose something better, to make a difference, as you say.” ~ Centauri Emperor Turhan (Babylon 5)

Things are in a state of flux. It’s probably an open secret that I’m struggling with a bit of depression right now.

My wife is in Washington, D.C., on assignment; she won’t be back until April 28th.

Musically, I’ve been spending more and more time practicing. This, of course, leads only to more and more isolation. I’m starting to learn new things, and my new skills are developing, but at the same time, my life seems to be flowing by in a great sagging tide.

At school, the year is ending. This year, I have a fantastic class of 6th graders, probably the best I’ve ever had. I will hate to lose them. They are clever, creative, and enthusiastic.

On Jamendo, something new is in the air, and not necessarily something good. There’s an egotistical new user who is bringing arrogance and snideness to the review process. Typically he posts several times a day, because the type loves to hear their own voice ring out their self-proclaimed truth and wisdom. The site is growing, and the features are improving; but in with the new comes change. I fear that the sense of community and the level of politeness and respect on the site are at risk.

And yet no one speaks up. Should I? But that would be putting myself in the same position, becoming the person trying to impose my own viewpoint on the site. Must I become a monster to fight a monster?

I give my opinion when it is asked, and so far, no one seems to be questioning the changing culture. Plus, it gets aggravating fighting battles. When you have come to love a place for the safe harbor it offers, it’s hard to turn it into a war zone.

Maybe I’m making too much of this. The music is still the most important thing on the site — so far there are no “in groups” and “insiders.” Maybe this is just the process of growth; what new cityscape has ever sprung up without a litter problem?

On DMusic, things have been pretty quiet. I’ve mainly been listening to new material by artists on my watchlist. There, the community is strong and has matured from (evidently) chaotic beginnings. So I see that the period of change can end on a positive note.

So if you’re a regular reader of this blog, yes, it’s been hard sitting down and writing new entries. I’m trying to keep a regular schedule of posting every 3 days, but some days, I’m just not capable. So apologies in advance for the interruptions.

On the bright side, most of my best music has been written in the low times. Maybe that Great Classic Album is struggling to be born.

Just a quick note.  My next major set of posts on this blog won’t be until the weekend (I’m in the process of reviewing a few albums, but I want to be certain of what I’m saying).  Right now, I’m trying to catch up on practice time.  Most of my Spring Break was spent either in Washington D.C. or in recovering from driving to Washington D.C., so I need to get my practice routines back into place.

Living a life on two different music sites, it’s sometimes hard to keep balanced. For example, Jamendo offers the opportunity to post album reviews on the site and on your blog simultaneously; I’ve taken advantage of this with my reviews of Lull, LucB, and SharashkA.

DMusic, on the other hand, is built on a different philosophy. The music is published on a track-by-track basis — occasionally grouped into albums, but still retaining the individuality of each effort. Further, there’s no way to comment on an entire “album” at once. Instead, individual tracks have individual comment pages. It’s not better or worse, just different: instead of dropping an album as a whole, unchanging block, there is the opportunity to actually listen to your comments and revise individual tracks if the need arises.

Therefore, in balancing my efforts, I’m going to have to do this one primarily by hand. Here is a review of one of the best up-and-coming artists on DMusic, gtr1960:

gtr1960: Toasted Goat

Greg has only been on DMusic since March 16 of this year — barely 22 days. And yet the music he’s posted has been phenomenal.

Note: to listen to any of the tracks below, and see the comments other DMusic users have left for each, click the links. From the comment page, you can stream the song itself by looking for the following link: Comments on [song name] (LoFi HiFi) by gtr1960. Clicking either the LoFi or HiFi links plays the song.

The tracks:

• Toasted Goat Cheesy — An excellent introduction; listen to that incredible guitar work.
• Love is on it’s Way — If you thought the band was special because of the guitar, think again. These incredible vocals — man, how I’ve missed singers that could really wail like this. It seems like commercial radio is more into devil voices and rap than the almost-classic baritone / tenor sound here. Remember when Ozzy used to cut loose, or Steve Perry before he fell victim to his own PR?
• Don’t Say Goodbye — Listen very carefully. Yes, that’s a Hammond B3! Now, in the first three tracks, this man has already established three of my favorite things. See how he moved to the top of the review list?
• Don’t Touch — This is a “live” recording, and according to his notes on this track, the soundman was “off.” Honestly, they’re rocking out so much who could tell? What amazes me is that even though this is a live track, most of his music actually sounds live. Case in point, another track, Undercover. In fact, I liked this one so much it made it on to my recent DMusic Top 20 list.
• HellHounds — According to the notes for this song, this is actually gtr1960 singing; I’m not certain who the vocalist was on some of the earlier songs.  In any case, he’s too modest — this is certainly a rockin track, and its certainly unfair for him to say of himself “Thought I would post it just to show people why I’m not the lead singer of ToastedGoat.”
• One Take Imrov Lead Thingy — Actually, this is a strategy I use a lot for writing tunes, myself.  I come up with an idea, hit record, and let the whole thing loose, warts and all.  Later on, you can go back and correct errors, but sometimes, you find your first idea, your gut reaction, was better than any intellectualization.  It’s similar to the principle I used on one of my own tracks, The Joy of Bass (actually, I played that one in a dream first, so I’m in a relatively undefined area here).
• Rains — Well, judging by the first comment on this one, I’m not the only person to be reminded of Journey.
• Sweet-N-Sour Sue — This was a close call; I almost put this song on my DMusic Top 20 instead of Don’t Touch.  Somehow this has a Stevie Ray Vaughn vibe to the guitar part.
• My First Attempt at Midi — One of the cool things about DMusic is that, sometimes, if you’re working on an idea, you can actually post an intermediate idea and get feedback before proceeding.  Another good example of this is Gothika (So Cold, So Alone) by the DMusic band T2.
• Undercover V2 — Let me close with the comment I left on this tune:

OMG, you must be the best new find of 2007. Welcome to DMusic!

For the past 5 days, I have been elsewhere — Washington, D.C., visiting my wife, who is there on a two month special assignment.  I’m posting the full story on my Dandelife blog, since it is less about music and more about the journey.

However, I’m back, and I’ll resume my regular schedule of posting to this blog tomorrow.  Upcoming topics:  a few new reviews, some elementary music theory, and more about the Woodshed project.